Archive for February 27, 2010
My Dad was a great man…but I don’t want to end up like him. That probably doesn’t make sense but if you keep reading, it most likely will. Much like my Dad, I was always the player, always the unfaithful one. Something happens to you where you get hurt so badly that it makes you want to change everything about yourself. I don’t know if this is the same thing that happened with him but it’s the scenario I was in. When my Dad moved to New Mexico a couple years after leaving my Mom in 1994, it seemed as if he was starting to change. He called it God’s Country. He was never a religious man until about 6 months before he and my mom separated. He was still living with us and he started going to church, which was odd. Long story short, this is where he had met someone new. Even through something as “good” as God made him do something as bad as meeting someone new. Fast forward to his most recent marriage. When my Dad met her it seemed like everything in the past melted away his old persona and he became something new. His old nickname “Bob” had now turned into his given name “Robert”. It’s like once he moved away he took on a whole new identity, and with good reason. I think he knew he needed to change and he was in a new place where nobody knew of him and nobody knew his past. He could make himself be whoever, and whatever, he wanted to be. Was it a lie he was telling? A front for everyone? No, of course not. Just a way to make that change in himself that he knew he had to make. His new love got the best years out of him that anyone could have gotten. Six years she had the man the he was supposed to have been over the last 70 years of his life. Once he made that change he had everything and she was right there along for the ride. She knew of his past, she knew of the things he did because he told her everything about himself. She accepted him. For six years she accepted him. He wasn’t being judged like before, he wasn’t being looked down upon for being “that guy” anymore, because he truly had taken it upon himself to be a better person. On December 8th, 2006 he was taken away. He is truly now in God’s Country. For only the last Six years of his life he was a good man, I don’t want to end up like my Dad.